Helping the Helpers - Useful Tips for Substance Abuse Caregivers

Substance Abuse (adjective): A maladaptive pattern of substance use leading to clinically significant impairment or distress.

(DSM-IV)

Thanks to social media and increasing awareness, the taboo around talking about substance abuse as a recognized medical problem is quickly dissolving.

We now know so much more about substance abuse than we did say, 10 years ago. And credit to that, we have been able to devise better ways and strategies to help people with this disorder.

While people with substance problems are getting much-needed help. One aspect we often overlook is recognizing the effort that goes into having someone close to you deal with substance abuse and all that comes with it.

The physical and mental exhaustion that comes with taking care of an addict is something we don’t talk about very often. A lot of us don’t know how it takes an incredible amount of courage, empathy, and patience to deal with such people.

Every single day, you need to choose to be there for them despite how difficult it’s going to be. Looking at them suffer at their own hands, dealing with them on their worst days, and having to constantly be the responsible one is no easy task.

Taking care of someone with a substance abuse issue is an incredibly lonely task. You need to constantly be there for them, dealing with their worst, all the while knowing they aren’t capable of doing the same for you when/if you need it.

This is why it’s okay to admit if you’re not doing okay. It’s okay to admit if you need help taking care of yourself because you’re tired of taking care of others. It’s okay to prioritize your own mental and physical health sometimes.

And know that you’re not alone. Hundreds of families, partners, and friends around the world are dealing with someone suffering from addiction. They too, feel like they’re tired, they too feel exhausted. There is no shame in admitting this. And there is no shame in seeking help if you need it.

Here are some ways you can help yourself while taking care of someone with a substance problem:

1. Talk About It

Admitting that you’re not okay is the first step on the pathway to feeling better. You can feel exhausted, without wanting to give up on the person you’re caring for.

Your feelings are valid. So confide them in the people you trust. Talking about it will help, it will help you feel less lonely. There is also solace in knowing that someone out there knows and acknowledges your struggles.

2. Join a Support Group

Like I said above, you’re not alone. There are so many people like you that are struggling while dealing with a close relative dealing with addiction.

There are support groups online and in person, where people discuss problems that come with caring for someone with an addiction. If nothing, there is comfort in knowing you’re not alone. And everyone is trying their best at doing what you’re doing.

3. Go to Therapy

Talking to a professional is always a good idea. They know and understand human emotions better than the average person. So they’ll be able to offer insight and advice that is more likely to help you.

4. Take a Break

Taking a break once in a while, when circumstances allow, is completely okay. Take that time to do things you enjoy, whatever they may be.

5. Prioritize Self-care

While you’re taking care of someone else, be sure you’re looking after yourself too. Do things that qualify as self-care for you. This can be anything that is important to you. It can be working out, going out for a walk, reading, or even meditating. Just take a few minutes of each day, to take care of yourself. This is to keep you sane while being able to care for others.

Always Be there for Yourself!

Remember, you can only care for others if you know how to care for yourself first. While you’re looking for the best ways to help your friend/partner/family member recover from substance abuse, look for ways to care for yourself in the process too.

Michael Herbert - The Recovery Guide has more than 30 years of experience working closely with individuals and families dealing with addiction and recovery issues.