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3 Tips for Making Your Divorce as Painless as Possible

Author: Amitava Sarkar
by Amitava Sarkar
Posted: Feb 07, 2015

For years, you fought tooth and nail to save your marriage. You’ve enlisted the aid of couples counselors, given each other space and reached out to countless friends and family members, but the relationship is simply unsalvageable. While there’s no denying that the two of you were once very much in love, you’ve grown apart in recent years. At this point, getting through a full day without having a heated argument constitutes a huge accomplishment. When you can barely stand to be in the same room as your significant other, you know it’s time for a separation.

Although you’re not crazy about the idea of divorce, you realize that it’s the healthiest course of action. Remaining in a relationship in which both parties are deeply unhappy won’t help anyone. Not only would such an arrangement increase your animosity towards your spouse, it would have a profoundly negative impact on your children. Having watched friends and relatives go through divorces, you know that the process can bring out the worst in both parties and put a considerable strain on their finances. However, by going into the separation process with the right mindset and utilizing a number of helpful tips, you can get through your divorce with minimal stress and heartache.

Hire a Good Attorney

When shopping around for the right attorney, limit your options to lawyers who encourage compromise and amicability. A disturbing number of divorce attorneys tap into their clients’ anger and openly encourage animosity towards their exes. In addition to exponentially prolonging the proceedings, this approach to divorce will ultimately result in higher legal fees. Unscrupulous lawyers won’t hesitate to draw out divorce proceedings if it means a higher payday. With this in mind, look for a family law attorney who truly has her clients’ best interests at heart and doesn’t view them as cash machines.

Open Yourself to Compromise

Unless your marriage is dissolving for a very one-sided reason or you live in a state with no-fault divorce laws, chances are you’re not going to get 100 percent of what you want. Of course, this isn’t to say that you should allow yourself to be railroaded. To ensure that you and your ex are both reasonably happy with the final results, it’s imperative that you open yourselves to compromise. Taking the time to sit down with your ex and your respective attorneys in a civil manner will diminish your stress levels and pay off in a big way for both of you.

Find an Appropriate Outlet for Your Frustration

When going through a divorce, it’s very common for both parties to experience feelings of anger and immense frustration. This often causes people to badmouth their exes to children and mutual acquaintances. Unfortunately, this stands to alienate your friends and family members and make them feel as if their loyalty is being put to the test. To avoid creating an uncomfortable situation, enlist the services of a therapist who frequently works with divorcees. Alternatively, if money’s too tight for therapy, attend a support group for people going through divorces. There’s nothing wrong with getting angry – particularly when locked in the throes of divorce – but your children and friends are not appropriate outlets for your frustrations.

If approached in the wrong manner, divorce can be an emotionally painful and incredibly costly undertaking. Far too often, couples enter divorce proceedings with the intent of hurting each other and getting the lion’s share of joint resources. By hiring a reliable attorney, being open to compromise and finding the proper outlet for your frustrations, you’ll set the stage for a stress-free divorce.

About the Author: Nadine Robins is a Chicago Area schoolteacher, mother of two and recent divorcee. Wanting her divorce to be as pain-free as possible, she enlisted the services of Conniff Law Offices. Happy to have experienced an amicable divorce, Nadine advices Chicagoans on the hunt for a skilled family law attorney to visit https://connifflaw.com/.

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Author: Amitava Sarkar

Amitava Sarkar

Member since: Nov 27, 2014
Published articles: 349

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