Denial – the biggest obstacle to recovery from alcoholism. Understand how to deal with an alcoholic

Like most severe addictions, alcoholism too prompts a denial phase in drinkers. There is a strange correlation between alcoholism and denial which makes it almost incomprehensible for a normal person to understand as to why the drinker refuses to see that he has clearly turned into an alcoholic when the signs and symptoms of alcoholism are glaring in his face.

The denial stage with an alcoholic starts with small lies at first, especially when he himself starts realizing that he has a problem and people around him start getting concerned. As his dependency on alcohol increases, so does the intensity of denial which often leads to irritation or conflicts with those who try to make him realize his drinking problem. Many a times, they would simply refuse to talk about the problem or dismiss it altogether. If the alcoholic is a strong willed and confident person, the denial may even be so strong that he might even end up convincing those concerned about him that he does not have a drinking problem.

How to deal with an alcoholic in denial

Dealing with an alcoholic who refuses to acknowledge that he has a drinking problem can prove to be quite challenging. This is especially so because drinkers may simply refuse to talk about it and may even start avoiding you if you persist. Some drinkers have also shown violent tendencies towards those who tell them that they have drinking problem.

The first essential to dealing with alcoholic is to approach them only when they are completely sober. This not only ensures a greater probability of them understanding or acknowledging that they might have a problem but also to a great extent guarantees that they would not simply get irritated or violent towards you.

Secondly, compassion is very important and the drinker would be more receptive to hearing how his drinking problem is affecting other people rather than just hearing accusations against him. If they start feeling guilty about it, it is the best opening possible for getting through to them.

What not to do while dealing with an alcoholic in denial

One of the common things which the family members of friends of the alcoholic do is to protect him from social or legal complications which arise due to excessive drinking. This is called Enabling and is a recognized symptom of alcoholism. This is particularly dangerous to the drinker since he knows he can rely on his friends to get him out of any problem which his drinking will cause, which will further encourage him to continue the drinking habits. At all costs, protecting the drinker by telling lies on his behalf or covering up for his slack in the work place should be avoided.