What Could Go Wrong with a Public Proposal Idea?

While a public proposal idea can sometimes be the right choice for you and your partner and can create a memorable and exciting occasion, it is certainly not for everyone. There are significant disadvantages that you should consider before even contemplating a public proposal.

One big problem that can occur with a public marriage proposal is that it might not go as planned. While you may often see wonderful, heart-warming proposals by men in front of crowds on YouTube, it is often only wonderful because the woman said yes. Sometimes this is not the case. If your relationship simply isn’t ready for that level of commitment, then you could not only end up being humiliatingly rejected in front of everyone you know – perhaps millions of people, especially if it gets put up on the internet – but also embarrassing your girlfriend, as well as making the witnesses uncomfortable. Although in reality most girlfriends hopefully wouldn’t cause you embarrassment by turning you down in public, a public proposal will put great pressure on them to accept even if they’re not completely sure. When you ask for someone’s hand in marriage, it’s a very serious question, and you want an honest answer. So unless you’ve discussed it beforehand and are certain she will accept, you might want to stick with a private proposal idea.

Another disadvantage to a public proposal idea is that it can be hard to keep it a secret, unless the whole world goes along with your plan. It can also sometimes also be an expensive start to the marriage, particularly if you plan something really elaborate, and if you go completely over the top, you may find that the wedding afterwards may seem lacking. A private proposal, on the other hand, offers you a chance for some intimacy when you ask this very private and important question, something that would be missing if you proposed at a game or at a restaurant.

As always, the most important thing to think about when considering any proposal idea is your partner’s preferences. If your girlfriend is shy or tends to become embarrassed easily, then she may not enjoy and even feel very uncomfortable with crowds of people cheering and watching as you get down on one knee. If this even remotely sounds like a reaction your girlfriend might have, then a public proposal is definitely not the right choice for you and your partner.

Frederick Holm writes for the F&L Designer Guides, which hosts a thriving community of independent engagement ring designers in the UK. Inspired by their journey of discovery in search of distinctive, one-of-a-kind engagement ring and a unique proposal idea, F&L now celebrates the works of their favourite designers and helps promote the notion of "Go Bespoke" as a more imaginative and interesting alternative to the limitations of High Street shopping.

Writer and Online Marketing Manager in London.